Here I am, writing The Race Recap. Except there was no race. (dun-dun-DUN!) Just a recap.
We were to fly up to New York on Friday morning. On Thursday night, we spoke with family and made all the arrangements for airport pick-up and borrowing cars and coordinating childcare, etc. I was exhausted, and had been feeling ragged all week, but I figured I would make up for it with a good night of rest and plenty of adrenaline on Saturday. We all went to bed early, bags packed and boarding passes printed.
Friday morning I woke up first. I was achey, queasy, and sweating. I convinced myself it was just warm in the room and that my stomach was threatening to heave because of nerves. I went downstairs, drank some cold water and made myself some toast. Then I heard Nico. Cough, cough, cough. Crying. I went up stairs and got him out of bed. Poor little guy was also warm and completely stuffed up, breathing through the mouth with yellow snot running out of his nose. R* was up by then, so I brought Nico into the bedroom and gave him his bottle. R* took one look at us and said we should stay home.
It took a while for me to concede. I kept thinking Nico might clear up, and I would just suck it up and go. If it were just me, I would have probably pushed it. But I was really afraid of flying with Nico as congested as he was. So we called family and told them we weren't coming and canceled the airplane tickets.
Not only was I incredibly disappointed about not running, but we both felt overwhelming guilt at not being there to support Annette during her first marathon, and to help her husband with their kids, like we had promised the night before!!! I have been avoiding posting about it because I feel so lame.
BUT I've decided to get over myself. These things happen. Annette ran a kick-butt marathon -- 26.2 FREAKIN' MILES -- and I'm so proud of her.
I'm also proud of myself. Even though I didn't run the actual race, I've still accomplished things that I've never done before. A 12.5 mile training run? I did that!!! The pride and accomplishment I feel are worth every moment of the training. The very, very best part of training for this race was doing things that just a few months ago seemed impossible. Training taught me to embrace the tough spots. It taught me that I can almost always go farther than I think, and that my reserves are deeper than I knew. It taught me that progress, even unimaginable progress, is possible if you just break things down and take them one at a time. These are lessons I feel spreading into every other part of my life, and THAT -- that empowerment and excitement -- is why running is addicting.
The physical pay-off was awesome, too. I am 15 pounds lighter now than I was at this time last year. My total cholesterol is down 30 points -- that's the difference between heading into prescription-land and being considered healthy; plus, my good cholesterol is up, and my bad cholesterol is down. I went from borderline overweight BMI to within the healthy range and I'm wearing a size I haven't worn since my mid-20s. I didn't injure myself during training and I can say that I'm 100 percent better off for having undertaken this crazy idea to run a 13-mile race. . . Even if I haven't run the actual race yet. :)
Count on me signing up for another race sometime soon.....